Vagrant

It was 12:00 at noon. I was in Tsinghua University's tenth mess hall waiting for one of my friends, who needs to share the fee card with me. I feel reluctant. I should have been here half an hour earlier and there will be less people. If I just use my own card, I will just have my lunch alone. Yeah, why not? I can choose the time and place for any of my meals. Suddenly I find out a bit about why I can't be with my ex-girlfriend for a long enough time. I am a vagrant. I want to arrange my time myself. I don't want to wait for someone before I want to do something. Nor do I want anybody telling me "it's time for this" or "it's time for that" against my own decision and habitats. Another people having every meal with me will soon or later make me mad. I have too much of my own business. Don't tell me someone will change this. It will only change when I finally learn to be still one day. Not in the predictable future. I am glad that I didn't run into some people's lives before. They will not be hurt by me and my vagrant character now. Sometimes I do feel alone. But at such times what I need is a spiritual companion more than one who eats with me. I don't like love and girlfriend being brought down to physical level.